Hipsters are nothing, if not emotionally tortured and tech-savvy. So how appropriate that one of our favorite blogs (and future books), Stuff Hipsters Hate, pointed us to the following Craigslist posting via their hysterical and always-on-point Twitter feed:
GROW SOME – w4m (Williamsburg)
Date: 2010-04-15, 10:17PM EDT
Grow some balls and tell me that you don’t want to see me anymore. Coward.
Amazing! Who hasn’t wanted to say exactly that to some guy (or girl) who has suddenly stopped returning your texts or has become too “crazy busy at work” to meet you for dinner? Although, in all fairness, if this woman is such a fan of having balls, then why can’t she say this to the guy’s face, or at least directly to his email inbox, instead of posting an anonymous message on a website? But hey, details. Communicating honestly and vulnerably is no easy task, especially with a guy who is indirectly giving you signals that he’s SO over it.
Anyway, I’m thankful to Stuff Hipsters Hate for reminding me of how much fun it can be to poke around Missed Connections, the addictive Craigslist personals section where they found the above posting. With romantic communication between the sexes at an all-time low (if you’re too afraid to call a date “a date,” then how can you be expected to put your much scarier feelings into words?), we are navigating a post-dating landscape that is full of missed connections.
The Craigslist definition of a missed connection typically involves peopleposting about someone who they don’t know, but who they saw or briefly talked to and are hoping to actually meet. Perfect for shy, “I should totally say something to that cute guy, but what? Oh no, he’s leaving! Quick! Think of something! Um…crap. Wait, come back! Dammit! He’s gone.” types.
But these days, there are so many other ways that we can misconnect with the people in our lives, particularly when it comes to romance. We can fail to tell someone that we like them, until it’s too late. We can hold back our true feelings for someone out of fear or indecision, eventually losing our opportunity to cultivate a deeper relationship with them. Or we can miss our chance to hook up with that hottie in the gym sauna. Thanks to Craigslist, there’s a space for us all to create second chances to explore these connections.
And you might even find a connection on one of the site’s other pages! I’ve heard quite a few tales of people getting involved with the guy or girl who rentedan apartment to them, sold them a couch, or auditioned as the drummer for their new band. It hasn’t happened to me yet – I have a habit of subletting apartments from fantastic gay men – but I truly believe that it could.
I’ve been thinking about buying some Pearl Jam tickets anyway…
Jess is the co-creator of The Gaggle, alongside her childhood best friend Becky Wiegand, and is the author of the book - yep! - The Gaggle. She never tires of hearing your post-dating stories. She wants you to enjoy your love life, and is full of advice on how to do so.
The-Gaggle.com is a website that explores modern romance in the Millennial era – which, let’s be honest, looks nothing like we were taught to expect. We feature essays, advice and social commentary with humor, compassion and brains, and we vow never, ever to publish a piece called “The 10 Best Ways to Satisfy Your Man in Bed”. Do click here to submit your work to us. We love you.